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But why can't I sleep in your bed Mummy?
24 August 2011
No matter how fun and inviting you make your baby's bedroom, the one thing that is always missing is YOU! Try as we might, getting babies and young children to want to sleep in their own bed in their own room is one of the hardest challenges in parenthood.
When waking at 2am to a crying baby who just wants to be cuddled, it is almost impossible to refuse. Everybody needs their sleep and many parents feel that if co-sleeping enables the whole household to sleep and consequently function properly the next day - then why not?!
Although this may seem fine in the short term, your baby is then likely to want to continue sleeping in your bed - even when they're a toddler... child... when does it end? Having a baby/child sleep in your bed night after night for a prolonged period of time is also likely to have a major effect on your relationship with your partner - and we all know where that can lead.
The answer... well there are always exceptions to the rule! But for the majority of babies and children their desire to be cuddled by you is fuelled by their built in NEED to feel safe and secure. While fun and exciting bedrooms look lovely during the day and are fabulous for playing, they are not always as popular at night. It may be important to turn off the lights and put yourself in your baby/child's shoes - are there any big, scary shadows?
Once you've creating a calm and relaxing environment to sleep in, you're next task is to give your baby/child the tools to feel safe and secure without YOU - to be able to send themselves back off to sleep and to feel happy and proud to stay in their own bed/room. This sense of security is usually found in the form of a comforter.
Comforters come in many shapes and sizes - and some children choose objects that are not made to be comforting! The important thing is that whatever it is, your child has to form an attachment to it. It's this attachment that brings security and comfort. Once you child has become attached to something, you should get another identical one - then you will always have a spare that can be used when the other needs washing or if one gets lost. Many babies keep their comforter for years into childhood so finding something that is washable and well-made is paramount - assuming that is that you are able to 'encourage' your baby's choice of comforter!
In the long term - comfort is the key to many happy nights sleep!
